one year later..

wow, i've now been in sa for a year (and a bit)! i dunno, for me it definitely does not feel like its been a year. i still get lost a lot (like just this afternoon). i still can't understand when people talk "african" to me (tho i've learned, whether good or bad, to simply reply with a good and crisp "sharp sharp"...). i still introduce myself as the new guy; the recent transfer, etc. time flies.

wow #2, i actually started this blog more than a week ago and haven't really been able to finish it for one reason or another. i have a couple hours before i leave for the airport now and i figured it was a good time to try and finish it. actually, i scraped most of my initial idea and am going to try something new. it may feel like preaching, but i really hope its more open and raw than i usually am. (forgive me if it ends up sounding a bit preachy)

2 things kept running through my mind this afteroon. the first: i had a little get together/braai/ bbq yesterday and one of my friends facetiously asked me if this had been the best year of my life. i brushed it off with some joke or another and said something to the effect of not looking at my years in that manner. everyone has things they can look back to each year and be really excited about or really sad about. so no, i don't really qualify or rank my years as best or worst. that question also actually evoked in me thoughts of all the bad and frustrating aspects of the past year. not exactly sure why, but thats where i found my mind wondering; there's my car, my work, adventures at the bank, my stolen cell phone, my expensive internet, my family and friends i left back in the us, etc...i mean with all those things this couldn't possibly have been my best year, right? those thoughts remained with me till today, particularly this morning at church (which btw, was a struggle to get myself up to go to this morning, but so glad i went...otherwise this lovely blog entry would not have been created).

so this brings me to the 2nd thing that crept up into my thoughts this morning/afternoon. a while back i was talking to a friend on gmail and i wrote something really spontaneously and then later realised that i actually meant it. i said that i had full intention to ensure that my stay in south africa (however long it will be) will bring about a radically new, improved, and mature me. I really felt (and desired) that i would be changed in a good, disciplined and godly way. now that process is not a quick one, im learning. and it can be painfully slow at times, and definitely hasn't happened yet, but i'm still pretty optimistic that it will happen.

now what the 2 things have in common is a bit obscure i know, but for some reason, putting those 2 together today, i came to the conclusion that actually, this has probably been my best year so far, in the sense that every successive year has been better than the previous. but this year especially i've learned so much, been exposed to so much, and had a chance to meet different people and experience different places and ideas than i normally would have.

since this thought came about at church, i can start with my experience at church. it took me a while to really find a church that i liked. and even when i had been attending the one i attend now, i was unwilling for several months, to commit, as there were loads of things i wasnt too confortable with or wanted different (this is pretty similar to my experience in chicago when i first got there). anyway, something made me stick to the church and im really glad that i did. at this church ive had the opportunity to:

• get a feel of a truly integrated environment. to be sure, this is NOT at all common in "the new" south africa.
• experience people that are open and real about themselves, their faith, and their struggles. and become comfortable (a bit) with sharing about mine.
• understand the true meaning of affirmation. usually my worst times at work are when we do annual reviews cuz then the manager gets to tell you things that u do well and what u can improve on. i love the constructive criticism; its the good part that always makes me uncomfortable for some reason. so when talk of affirmation comes, i've always dismissed it as unnecessary. but i can say with confidence that us guys NEED affirmation (don't even try to deny it). over the last couple months or so, ive met someone whos a mentor, friend, brother (from another mother), father, guide...all rolled up in one. and ive been so blessed not only by his wisdom and our breakfasts, but also his affirmation. god seems to provide this for me everywhere that i go, but its not until now that i'm realizing the tru value. more on this later.
• be in community with some awesome people doing awesome things. involvement in the community is a huge thing at this church. even this morning the senior pastor, to the initial chagrin of the preacher, got everyone up before the guy started preaching and asked us to fill up food boxes that was to go to zimbabwe cuz they just got a whole bunch of food and they were worried how they would pack them all in time. it took us like 10 minutes, and it was chaotic, but it was "holy chaos", as the senior pastor (black, btw, in a white church) described it. at the end, every one was so blessed and many shared how that touched them.
• speaking about community, there just so many quality people at this church, always trying to get me to be involved (very un-vineyard-like!), and coming up to me just to chat or whatever.

my friends here have made this an amazing year. ive learned so much from them. one friend teaches me all the time about issues that i would not have thought about or discussed cuz i used to be on the opposite spectrum of such arguments and would not listen to people like him. another close friend challenges me on my stance (very american or un-african, she calls it). this same friend has taught be so much about being a good/caring friend and how to treat women. but isnt me, myself, and i enough?! this same friend also has contributed to the affirmation aspect i talked about above. to hear someone tell you that you know how to be a good man, etc, is more touching than most things (take note girls!). these are just examples, but all my friends have contributed to my "learning" in some way or another. and of course are loads of fun.

finally, my adventures have been incredible. most of the pictures, i've posted here or on my picasa page. i admit im not the most adventurous person (and south africa is really good for reallly adventurous people), but the little that ive been able to do have been great. how can adventures in uganda, drakensberg, pilanesberg, cape town, and of course jo burg not make this the best year! theres lots more places im looking forward to going to next year, so probably next year will be even better...

now on to things im looking forward to for next year; sort of my new years resolution, a couple weeks early (and anyone can hold me to this):

• do more random trips to random places
• go safari-ing
• be more involved in community
• take the gmat; get my mba
• find ways to enjoy my work
• eat more mangos
• there's probably more, but my ride is now waiting for me, see y'all on the flip side...

random thought #354106756: i was reading thru some of my very early blogs just now and i noticed a couple things:

- my blog entries have gotten significantly longer. i think that might have something to do with the fact that i write less often, so more to say i guess. or maybe ive just learned the art of rambling a bit more. probly the latter.

- and whats up with me and obama?? its like this guy is the 2nd coming of the saviour!

merry christmas.